Category Archives: Kink critical

What is wrong with BDSM? This is how I see it affecting practitioners (Part 2)

< C) Ways in which BDSM affects mainly the practitioners C1) It creates/ maintain/s encourages a situation where the hurting person asks to be hurt again, and often even hurt worse A hurting person who is unambiguously against what happened … Continue reading

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What is wrong with BDSM? This is how I see it affecting society (Part 1)

Trigger warning: Sexual violence I never met a kinkster who wants to honestly discuss BDSM. They never want to talk about pain. They do not want to tell me what tops/ doms/ sadists get out of BDSM. They only give … Continue reading

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Does BDSM give society wise messages about consent?

There is more than one way to diminish the importance of something. Compare: a) “Money is unimportant, don’t complain about your poverty.” b) “Money is very important. I will give you 5 cents – then stop complaining about your poverty.”

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What 50 Shades of Grey (and other romantic stories) really say about women – it was not what I thought

When “50 Shades of Grey” came out, I did not want to live on this planet any more. In my mind, women were reading about a woman getting beaten and stalked – and enjoyed hearing how she suffers. I read … Continue reading

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Who treats sex as dirty?

Not so long ago, I tried to tell a woman what I find wrong with pornography and BDSM, as I sometimes do “Don’t tell me you are one of those people who think all sex is dirty”, she spat back. Who thinks sex … Continue reading

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Another reason why consent is not enough to make BDSM okay

This quote by C. K. Egbert shows why we cannot make “consent” our only standard of whether an action is moral or not: “Let’s presuppose that we live in the world the BDSM people would like, where the “physical details … Continue reading

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BDSM is not “safe:” The BDSM community in their own words

  Kinksters who are honest admit that the BDSM scene has predators. Kitty Stryker say: … Basically, we [Kitty and Maggie Mayhem] realized that we have had very similar negative experiences in the BDSM scene. When we started talking about … Continue reading

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Why would anyone want to be a BDSM bottom partner? Reflections from someone who struggles with BDSM fantasies

This is the words from someone who calls herself Ro. B. Warning: Please be aware that talk of rape, bondage, etc. may be triggering for some survivors of sexual abuse. Instead of placing a piece this long in a quote block, … Continue reading

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UNsafe and HARDLY consensual: Arguments not to defend BDSM with

(Warning: Some links and the picture on this blog entry is NSFW. Trigger warnings for rape and other forms of sexual violence also apply to the contents of this blog post, and the links.) You may have heard of people defending BDSM. … Continue reading

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Why consent is not enough in BDSM

The first time Louise encountered Bondage, Domination, Sadism and Masochism on the Internet, she was revolted. How could anybody treat another human like that? She was so disgusted, that the pictures kept replaying in her mind. And then a strange … Continue reading

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